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Posted by D Sherman [72.47.9.228] on Saturday, May 21, 2011 at 12:29:39 :
In Reply to: No Apocalypse - now I gotta service my truck ... posted by Jim Hauls! [205.144.211.106] on Saturday, May 21, 2011 at 11:35:36 :
I got raptured. Why didn't you? It's great up here in heaven. We've got lots of wilderness full of elk and moose and power wagons. All the creeks are clean enough to drink out of, and there are big trees all over. It's a lot like North Idaho except the rubber parts never rot out, the sheet metal doesn't rust and the gates are all unlocked.
I went over to the scrap yard today and there were half a dozen FFPWs lined up by the fence and the man said, "Sure, take anything you want. This is heaven you know." Went to the gun show and there was a guy at one table that had a real nice original Tommy gun. He saw me looking at it, and said, "Here, take it out back and see how you like it. There's a Ford up against the hill you can shoot at" I said, "What about the class III paperwork?" He said "You're in heaven now. No paperwork. If you like the gun, keep it." So, I'm going for a drive up in this hills this afternoon in my rust-free '52 M37 with non-rotted rubber, on a non-gated road, to try out my new machine gun. It looks like I am going to have to pay for the gas, but it's 25.9 and they wash your windshield, check your oil and battery, give you a map, and give you kid a plastic dinosaur.
I suppose being as how it's heaven and I did make it onto the rapture list, I'd best go to go to church tomorrow, but I hear they've got Credence Clearwater for the band, and they're having a big barbecue down by the river, so it'll be okay. They've even got Internet up here! So enjoy your Tribulation and Apocalypse down there on Earth, suckers. I hear if you tough it out (for either 40 days or 1000 years depending on who I ask), they'll bring you up here too. Your dogs and trucks will be waiting for you.
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