Jeep Tales


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Posted by apb in the tropical rainforest on Monday, October 30, 2006 at 0:10AM :

My wife, the lovely Mrs. Bloom, just bought herself a Honda CRV, a very nice car.

Heated leather seats, XM radio that's wicked loud, moon roof, cruise, electric mirrors, windows, door locks. Some kinda 4WD that happens when you need it. Clever little computer that tells you MPG, etc. Plenty-o-leg room. Plenty of zoom, even from the 4-banger. Absolutely quiet at 80 mph. Last new car I owned was a 1966 IH Scout, so you can see that I'm impressed by all this stuff.

While we were shopping around, we figured we'd give Jeep a chance. We visited a Jeep dealer, and we took a two-minute test drive in a Cherokee and drove back into the lot.

(all we could stand...man, what a humble interior...like sitting on a piece of plywood with 1/32 inch of foam rubber under your behind. Windshield slope is so flat that you need to crane your neck to see out, if you're 5 foot 16 like me. The one we drove had a loud bearing/grinding noise in reverse, like something metallic was wound around the drive shaft.)

The shifty-eyed salesman with a shiny suit and a pinkie ring told us, among other things, "You know, this model Jeep is not intended to be used off-road. The suspension has been lowered by 6 inches, because so many people were flipping them over. So it would hit obstacles, and void the warranty if you were to do that."

When I pointed out that the website claims it has "off-road capability" he said that's just hype, and not to believe it. I asked him if it would be able to handle a dirt driveway with snow on it, and he said "probably."

What a salesman!!!



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